Good Twin vs. Bad Twin

Me: Red, do you want to go to the zoo this weekend?

Red: Yeah!! Can I hold her?

Me: Hold who?

Red: The baby. Can I hold the baby up?

Me: I don’t think she’ll be here this weekend, but when she gets here you can.

Red: Okay. She too wittle. She can’t see all the animals waaay up high. I hold her up.

Me: That’s very sweet of you. You’re very nice.

Red: Yeah. I the nice twin.

Time Out, Baby!

Blue was resting his head on my belly, watching tv. The baby moved, noticeably. Blue sat straight up and looked at me, very confused.

Me: The baby just kicked you.

Blue: WHAT?!

Me: The baby was moving in there and just kicked you.

Blue: That baby needs to go in time out!